how badass?

http://www.luckybrand.com/Product.aspx?p=LBX15704&l=00160191000000000000&km=&pn=1

i want. i want nowwww.
i love lucky brand. but its so damn expensive.



LOOK AT THOSE JEANS!!!
ahhh. they're putting one in the mall and i am sooooooooo freaking excited.
ahhh.
love lucky.
:D

little soul, you're dreams are waiting.

i enjoy the holidays. i get to see my familys craziness at its finest.
it's great.

everyone is having problems and blaming other people.
don't lie, it's your fucking fault.
now stop crying and do something about it.

i want to make something. i want to do something with my fingers other than type, but i don't know what.
yesterday i was gonna paint and make bracelets, but my mother preoccupied me so much that by the time i had the time, it was almost midnight. fuck doing anything then.

someone said that conor oberst died.
i highly doubt it. and i hope its just a mean rumor.

gerard and lyn-z are having a baby. i'm excited. i hope it's a girl.
why, i have no idea. i think, for some reason, gerard would be happier with a daughter...idk. i'm just excited. that's gonna be one badass kid.

i wonder what i'm going to wear today.
i want to see twilight again.
i want to read the series of unfortuanate events again, mainly so i can read the last two books that i have yet to read. [last two or the last, i cant remember.]
i want to be better at guitar. and basketball for that matter.
the orange in my hair is practically out, and i dont think my mom is gonna let me dye it again cause break is almost here.
this year did not turning out the way i planned it to.

it's hysterical.

i laugh because everyone takes what happens online so seriously.
apparently facebook dictates our life now.
i laugh cause people i barely talk to ask me about my boy. everyone is so obsessed with out relationship, i feel kinda like britney spears or gerard way. it's not a nice feeling, and i feel bad for them.
i laugh because i can't be more busy or in anymore pain if i tried, and i have basketball practice today. and i'm convinced that i will die in that gym.
my back is literally killing me.
it's funny to me cause i can't keep twilight off my mind, and i wish that vampires existed. i saw the movie twice so far, and i keep going over quotations on a website, finding ones that i like, and then reading basically the whole chapter where that quotation is. which just proves how much of a dork i am.
i'm just tired.
i'm just ready for summer break.

not enough hours in the day...

i haven't been this tired in the history of my life. yes watching the midnight premier could have something to do with it. but i believe i would be this tired no matter what.
i did well in guitar today. annie did her convocation and it was very good/funny. i love her/her family.
i love basketball.
i hate my coaches, i hate my practices, but i love playing in games. scrimmages during practice, no. games/scrimmages against other teams, yes.
35-9 was the score at half time. guess who was the 9. the game end with 47-43 as the score. i was so excited we caught up, and i did well. i had an adrenaline rush or something, i was playing great against girls who were at least 6feet.
prebus ride, bus ride, and pregame was so much fun. grace and cate are ridiculous. i love them.
i got a new phone and i can once again text the boy. it as killing me not talking to him.
i was gonna say something else but i forgot. oh well.

today is the boys bday.
HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY! [i've said it like, 5times.]
it snowed for you :]
twilight was amazing. i want to see it tomorrow. i had a dream about it. :D

decode.

i'm going to die from excitedness.
i'm going to see twilight at midnight and i couldnt be more pumped.
my boy turns 16 tomorrow and i'm excited as hell.
i think i did well on my chem and french test.
i hugged maggie.
i sang songs from 2005-1980 or something with my friends.
i watched pocahontas today.
i don't know. i'm just kinda chipper.
i wish i had my phone so i could talk to my boy though.
i miss him lots. :/
yesterday was pop pop's death day, and i totally forgot.
i feel horrible for forgetting.
i'm sorry.
i still love you.
i still miss you.

i was pissed.

but blake lifted my mood.
he's awesome. yeah he's always depressed and suicidal. but he's so nice.
he read my hatefilled bulletin and sent me this:

which made me laugh hysterically.
then he gave me his cell if i ever needed someone to talk to. that really made me smile.
he's a great kid.
but i'm still mad at my parents.

i think emz is pretty.

i wish i looked like her.debz is pretty too.
actually, all my UK rmy friends are freaking pretty.
it's kinda annoying.
i wish my hair was longer.
i wish i was smarter >_< that would be great and my parents would stfu.
fm,sdkkfhsdljrkfnweajkhaihfjewlkaflhfaiuoojewr903uejidskd

i need money :/

and even though i have my moms camera, i want mine. and i want mine now.
my back hurts :[
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE.


CAN I HAVE PLEASE?!?!
like, PRETTY PLEASE.
i think i'm gonna ask for an early birthday or christmas present.
ohmygod.
i want it so badly.
i might cry.

7 things i hate about you.

i hate it when people wear basketball shoes for everyday life.
i hate it when people are obnoxious.
i hate it when people are bitches during concerts.
i hate it when people fight for no reason.
i hate it when people hate things/people without a purpose.
i hate it when people talk shit about people the don't even know.
i hate it when people lie.

et je te hais de tout mon corps. mais je t'adore.

last night was amazing. i wanted to cry during escape the fate i love them so much. and meeting max again and craig made the night even better.

guess who didn't get invited again...

even though they know that i love nevershoutnever.
they fucking know.
those assholes.

night riders.

i call them the night riders, cause i mostly see them at night.
sometimes there's only 3, other times there's about 60-70.
they ride around on their bikes. like, dirt bikes and 4 wheelers.


those kind of bikes, in the middle of the city. sometimes they have bandannas around their face so you only see their eyes.
and there's always that one, or a few guys on regular bikes trying to keep up.
either way i see them all the time. i wish i could take pictures of them because it's awesome and hardcore. it also makes me love baltimore. i have no idea why, but it does.

I FUCKING LOVE ERIN.

she got to go to a concert [cute is what we aim for] and i wanted to go, but couldn't.
she met shaant.
[rememb
er i took this picture in september/october?]
i fucking love him.
anyways, she met him and CALLED ME. but i was in the shower so i didn't answer, but they left a message, and he says hi to me! *squee*
i'm keeping that message forever. it shall never be erased.
i fucking love that girl.

and i do NOT want you to like me.

ralphie and i sat in the library during 5th period and bitched about the world. bitched about how horrible all our "friends" are, how we're not happy, how we can only stand to be around about 3 people, [okay theres more counting liz, yerami and the freshmen, but i barely see them,] how i hate being home. we bitched and i felt better that someone felt the same way but i still felt shitty.
i used to be happy. even when i was failing out of school i was fucking happy...generally. i didn't want to go home and hang myself [figurative speech there,] i didn't want to lock myself up in my room and paint, i didn't want to leave and stay with my sister and or aunt. i liked coming home. and i liked being home once i was there. now i find every excuse not to be home, and every excuse to me home. i don't want to be there, but i don't want to leave. it's not like things are bad in my household or anything. i only fight with my mom occasionally, but that was always the case, and it's always over stupid things. but it's been like that forever so whatever.
i'm not happy. and my imagination is getting more detailed and i'm afraid that one day is gonna take over and i will be gone. not now but in a couple of years...i just, urg i don't know anymore. i miss lower school.

i'm freaking obsessed with william control. i have no idea why...i didn't think i'd really like it. i didn't like it. when i first heard beautiful liar i thought wil had made a terrible mistake. but now i have the cd and i listen to it all the time and i love it.
it's probably the lyrics....no the music is good. the prologues the best though.

allow me to be frank at the commencement. you will not like me. the gentlemen will be envious and the ladies will be repelled. you will not like me now and you will like me a good deal less as we go on. ladies, an announcement: i am up for it. all the time. that is not a boast or an opinion. it is bone hard medical fact. i put it round you know. and you will watch me putting it round and sigh for it. don't. it is a deal of trouble for you and you are better off watching and drawing your conclusions from a distance than you would be if i got my tase up your petticoats. gentlemen, do not despair. i am up for that as well, and the same warning applies. still your cheesy erections until i have had my say. but later when you shag - and later you will shag - i shall expect it of you. and i will know if you have let me down. i wish you to shag with my homuncular image rattling in your gonads. feel how it was for me. how it is for me, and ponder. "was that shudder the same shudder he sensed? did he know something more profound? or is there some wall of wretchedness that we all batter with our heads at that shinning, livelong moment. that is it. that is my prologue. nothing in rhyme, no protestations of modesty you were not expecting that i hope. i am william control. and i do not want you to like me.

everyone is stupid.

and i hate them all.
she's always trying to prove me wrong, and always trying to bring me down.
she may not know it but it's true and i'm sick of it and i wish she would stop.

i'm hungry but i don't want to go downstairs, cause going downstairs means seeing and maybe talking to her, and we aren't really talking at the moment. but i'm hungry, so downstairs i will go.
i need to do homework.
i need to clean my room.
i need to find my camera.

hate culture.

i got 95 new songs yesterday [saturday.]
i love william control. it's better than i expected.
i also got escape the fate, hawthorne heights, josephine collective, nightmare of you, the white tie affair [concert,] rise against, cash cash, and a few stray songs. one of which includes decode by paramore. it's an amazing song.


i'm bored and tired and i should probably go to bed....

you know she's dancing at the disco.

1. i'm sick of this election. i can't wait for it to be over.
2. everyone is so mean. even my friend who i thought were the nicest people in the world, turn out to be grade A bitches as well. they talk about people like j does. what made it worse was they thought i was joking when i was telling them to stop. and they leave me during concerts without saying bye or brb or anything.
3. last night was flipping amazing. even with my friends being annoying.



i'm sorry, but trace cyrus shirtless?
i almost died. i love trace. not just because he's hot.



i feel like running around downtown and taking pictures.
i feel like making something. doing something with my hands. a bracelet, a painting, anything.
i want my camera back.
but mostly i want my friends back. the ones that are nice.